This Thanksgiving I think that our nation needs to sit back, enjoy some food, and realize what we are truly thankful for, not only as a individuals, but as a nation- a society. Sure, there are many things to be thankful for this year, I personally am celebrating the third Iraq War (even though I took a personality quiz that says I’m really a Gulf War kind of guy), but I think what truly deserves recognition in this country is the culture of our consumerism. Let’s talk about consumerism. Our economy, the largest single one that has ever existed, is based almost entirely on consumerism.

So the more stuff you buy that you don’t need, the more money those moguls at the top of the world make, and everyone knows trickle down economics is fool proof, because what insanely rich person doesn’t like to give poor people money?

But in all honesty, everyone loves the holidays. Except people who have terrible unseen personal scars and traumas that they dredge up year after year, reminding them of suffering and tragic loss. But yeah, Christmas (it’s first on the calendar, in case anyone thinks this is a war), Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, simple Winter Solstice, whatever, the season is great because everyone gets material stuff that they secretly want but act too non-materialistic to ask for in front of their friends.

And you know what else everyone loves? Food. No lies, just straight to the point, this is America and we like food. It happens. And Thanksgiving is the Holy Grail of holidays based around food! So let’s eat up! Right? Now hold up here, let’s slow our roll, not swallow. The Holiday Season is great and all, because a non-denominational holiday based around a communal love that our culture shares is followed by a series of deeply religious Holidays where people get to appreciate what they really have for a solid month. Cool. Do you know where I will be the day after Thanksgiving? Let me just go ahead and kill the suspense, I’ll be with my family, because that’s where I like to be. Do you know where I’ll be on Thanksgiving? I’ll be with my family.

Let’s talk about the series of strikes that Walmart is suffering from, as many places around the country, they are mandating that their workers report in for duty at 6 a.m. on Thanksgiving Morning. That’s right, on a nationally sanctioned holiday.  Why? Why would Walmart be forcing employees to come in on a day where everyone is expected to be at home with family? Last minute turkey?

Try again. Black Thursday shopping. Black Friday was enough, ya now, with the deaths and all, and Cyber Monday was fine, just enough to slip in there unnoticed, because we already spend all of our time in front of computers anyway, but the official Black Friday sales begin on Thursday morning across the country. Due to this, there are dozens strikes from Walmart employees from the East to the West Coast. I think that the most confusing part about this whole scenario, is that this ploy has to be terrible for PR, yet it is still happening.  The same thing happened years ago in the sixties, when there weren’t any stores open on Sunday across our country, but before long, everyone and their uncle was open on Sunday. Folks, what we may be looking at is the death of family holidays in this world.

Good riddance.